Words of advice needed

Hello everyone,
I am looking for words of advice, people who have been in simular situation, ect.
I'll start off with a quick bit of history, all my life i have been a very avid quader, and snowmobiler. 5 years ago I met the man I love and he introduced me to dirtbiking, in turn i indroduced him to snowmobiling, and we both fell in love with a new sport. For the first while I was trying to learn how to ride dirtbike, on his bike(at the time he had a Honda CRF450R) I found that this was simply too much bike for me, I was ok with the power, but the size and weight of the bike was just too much, and so I struggled with it alot. So about 2 years ago I finally found a bike of my own, I picked up a 2007 Honda CR125R and I love it, even though its about the same height, it weight waaaayyyy less, and dispite it being a 2 stroke i find the power delivery very managable. Shortly after I got the bike we headed out for a week holiday of camping quading and dirtbiking. On our second day out just my boyfriend and i went out for a quick evening ride on the bikes before the sun set. We were riding mostly just simple flat trails, my boyfriend had gotten a little way ahead of me when a deer jumped out from behind a bush right infront of me. I paniced and did a really stupid thing by clamping on the binders, thus sending the bike into a skid as the bike went down it struck my leg and snaped it clean in 2(just a note i was wearing full riding gear, riding boots, pants, jersey, chest protector, helmet ect.). When my boyfriend noticed that I was no longer behind him, he came flying back to see what was up. What he found was me laying on the ground holding my leg screaming a few choice words. A quick assesment revieled that everything still looked normal, nothing was pointing at odd angles however I could not move my leg it was stuck at about a 90 degree. I'll cut the details but my boyfriend had to leave me sitting in the trail and go back to camp, he returned with his pickup truck and an off duty police officer who happened to be camping near by and stoped to visit with the rest of our group back at camp. After a very painful move into the truck my boyfriend and I started the very long slow drive to the closest town with a hospital. There x-rays showed just how bad it was, it was a tibial plateau fracture with the bottom of the tibia being displaced backward causing restricted blood flow to my foot. 3 days, 1 surgery, 2 metal plates, and 7 screws later I returned to camp and spent the rest of our holiday laying on a reclining lawn chair. Fast forward to last year I did get back on the bike, but only did a few small putts around the field cause my leg was still very weak. Now come this year and I am ready to get back on and try some real riding again.
However this is where I need some advice, the crash really scared both me and my boyfriend, he still seems to have more appreshension about me getting back on the bike than I do. I never did get to be a very strong rider befor the crash and so now I am essentuay starting from square one. I did do one trail on the may long and it went fine, I did fall down a lot cause the trail was verry verry slick, but other than a few bruses all is well. I guess what I'm asking is how do I get rid of the fear and tension for myself, and how do I assure my boyfriend that its going to be ok?

Sorry this was such a long post, i really appricate any advice, suggestions, and comments.

Thanks
ps I attached a pic's of my leg, just the befor and after surgery x-rays but they still tend to give some people the hebejebes.

I've crashed lots, broke lots bones and the plate holding my collar bone together. And the only advice I could offer is get back on and ride. It's the only way to be a better rider and get the experience. Take it easy and enjoy till the confidence picks up then step it up a bit. If ya feel uneasy about something don't do it.

My wife has ridden bikes for a few years, but osteoarthritis in both knees has put an end to our dirt biking. Happens with age. My suggestion is get back on the horse, but if you are doing off-road trail riding, I would strongly suggest getting tires for the bike for soft conditions. Most MX bikes use a hard terrain tire which are dismal in muddy conditions, and will sacrifice control of the bike in slick conditions. The "mud" tires will work ok on hardpack, but will wear a bit quicker - still better then a broken bone. Best wishes, hope that you make a full recovery (both physical & mental). The mental recovery is the tougher one to obtain...

Take it from my not quite 3 year old daughter. She's started riding a two wheeled pedal bike this spring(training wheels on of course) 2 nights ago her and i are out in our culdasac and shes riding around(helmet,elbow pads,knee pads on) she turns the bars way to sharp and falls over forward flat on her face, hands still on the grips and arms underneath her. Not a tear fell from her eye, dads having a panic attack(lol) i walked over to pick her up the little bugger pushed me away picked herself and her bike up told me " I do it my own self daddy, im ok" got back on the bike and took off riding. Long story short no matter how well protected or prepared we think we are, **** still happens and i wish us adults could be as open minded and fearless as our children.

Deano

Deano670 said:

Take it from my not quite 3 year old daughter. She's started riding a two wheeled pedal bike this spring(training wheels on of course) 2 nights ago her and i are out in our culdasac and shes riding around(helmet,elbow pads,knee pads on) she turns the bars way to sharp and falls over forward flat on her face, hands still on the grips and arms underneath her. Not a tear fell from her eye, dads having a panic attack(lol) i walked over to pick her up the little bugger pushed me away picked herself and her bike up told me " I do it my own self daddy, im ok" got back on the bike and took off riding. Long story short no matter how well protected or prepared we think we are, **** still happens and i wish us adults could be as open minded and fearless as our children.

Deano

Click to expand...

Now Deano, are you sure this story isn't the other way around?.... you with the training wheels, falling off and your daughter coming to help YOU up?

What can i say TG cant know up before you know down

Deano670 said:

What can i say TG cant know up before you know down

Click to expand...

I'm speechless lol

Back to the topic at hand.

Get back on and ride around, regain your confidence, it may take a while, but others have said don't feel you HAVE to go everywhere, if you aren't comfortable doing a climb, or anything say so, someone in your riding group should be willing to help you out. Whatever you do, don't let the injury ruin your riding career!

I was riding my dirt bike coming around a corner on the trail and some yahoo came stroking around the bend on my side, I took to the bush, flipped and the last thing I remember is my bike running me over, the DB never stopped, and my buddies packed me to the hospital, a week later I was released, and about a week after that I was back on my bike. I was pretty hesitant for a couple of weeks but slowly got my confidence back...just stick with it, your confidence will come back. Your significant other will start to relax as time goes by too.

Just ride... It gets easier. I'm sitting on the bench right now with a torn out Labrum (shoulder) after shoulder checking a 12" poplar tree last July. I have no problem getting back on. But it's taken me over 20 broken bones to become this drama free. Lol. Good luck.

Like everyone says.....get back on that horse and enjoy life.

That is a freaky experience, compiled with injury so you'll have some lasting anxiety associated with the situation for sure. As women we are kind of programmed to think of the "worst case scenario" Biologically. This helps us to anticipate danger being moms and caretakers for the peeps we love. Unfortunately it's why many of us have anxiety and long lasting trauma when we experience a scarey situation.
You're overall bike skills will come back quickly, but working through that pit in your stomach will take a bit of work at first, but you will overcome it.
When out riding, make sure you're with peeps who understand your situation. The moment you start feeling somewhat anxious, acknowledge it and force yourself to breathe deeply. Affirmations either spoken out loud, or in your mind will help to bridge the moments between anxious and relaxed. Breathing deeply, you can say to yourself. "I am safe at this moment" "Everything is ok". Sounds simple, but it works to push away the anxiety so you can focus on what is around you. The smell of the bikes, the breeze, the awesome peeps around you .. which reconnects you to the fun aspect of riding. Remind yourself that accidents happen. That was freak accident with a deer that in all reality probably will not happen again, but right now it feels like it can happen at any moment. Get some practice time in, setting yourself up for the unexpected. Practice stopping quickly, dodging obstacles, so you feel confident in your ability no matter what may come at you. If you need some extra help I'd be more than happy to come out riding with you. Support networks are awesome, and will help you to get back into a happy place. Sometimes our dudes don't get it. I was from BC, now living in Alberta, where the terrain is different. Not being used to sand I've been chucked into the rhubarb more than once in the last while. My husband doubled back to give me heck about not keeping up.. and I tried to explain to him that getting myself OUT of the tree, and getting the bike off of me ate up some of my time... lol. Lesson being.. go at your own pace, ride with peeps who respect your pace, and your confidence will come back.
You can get a hold of me here or at T&T Powersports 780-826 6121. We ride several times per week, and i would love to help you any way I can.

Take care!
Trish

Not much else you can do but get back out and ride, if that's what you'd like to do You'll probably spend a season being uneasy but it'll get better the more you go and the more confidence you gain. I'm just getting back on a bike this season after a few years away from it, and I didn't get very good before I stopped riding either. After a couple surgeries I'm ready to try er again and see how it goes. Nervous as **** and my injuries weren't from a bike crash, I understand your hesitancy. Go on short, safe rips until you get your MoJo back. As for the BF's nervousness...that's his problem haha